Dearly Beloved,

Blessed greetings from the Land of the Hot Sun!  It’s true, I’m back in Kenya.  I came back a little early this year to arrive in time to stand as a groomsman in the wedding of Bishop Zak’s oldest son, Nelson.  Much like our Junes, December is high wedding season in Kenya; the weather tends to be at its most benign and many Kenyans are already in the habit of traveling to their ‘home’ in the country (as opposed to ‘where they stay’ in the city) for the Holidays.

The wedding retained much of traditional African culture but was infused with an abundance of Western practices and traditions.  There was a dowry, of course.  Nelson’s younger brother, Eli, had the responsibility of taking the cows from the Bishop’s home in Amagoro to Gladis’s family home in Chaptais, a few hours walk up into the hillsides of Mt. Elgon.  It doesn’t take long for Kenyans to realize that there is dowry hoofing it up the road, and all along the way Eli was propositioned – mostly in good fun - by the older mamas who had come to watch him pass: “Young man, why are you taking those cows so far away?  We have lots of good girls here in this village.  For all of those cows, we’ll even get you two!”  Knowing Eli’s business acumen, I suspect he was sorely tempted by the offer, but ultimately thought better of it and finished the journey to Chaptais.  His trials were not over however: as they arrived at the gate to Gladis’s home, they were again blocked by a posse of young relatives demanding ‘something small’ by way of a toll to pass through to the house.  As Eli put it, “Man, we were tired…so we just paid.”

Though I missed the dowry presentation, I arrived in time for the pre-wedding.  By way of explanation, in African tradition a bride is seen as leaving her family, thus forgoing any inheritance, to join the family of the groom who retains both his family affiliation and right of inheritance.  Both the dowry and the pre-wedding are an acknowledgment that the bride’s family is loosing a valuable member.   And while we have no such tradition in the US, the pre-wedding fills the typical time slot for our rehearsal dinner and becomes the time when the bride’s family says good-bye to their daughter.  In the presence of the groom and his family, family members come forth one-by-one to give advice to the bride and the occasional stern warning, from which even the groom is not exempt.  “Gladis, you see how skinny your man is?  It is your job to make him fat!” “Make sure you always have tea and sugar and some food in your pantry to welcome visitors.” “ Nelson, you see how you have found your bride today: beautiful, healthy, well educated.  That is also how we want to find her when we visit.  That is your work!”  In some ways, the pre-wedding becomes a day-long session of pre-marital counseling, with most every family member weighing in.  Tough crowd too…but good natured.

The wedding itself took place at St. Thomas Church in Amagoro and was presided over by the Arch Bishop of Kenya, the Most Reverend Eluid Wabukala, old friend to Bishop Zak.  I loved the procession.  No solemn escorting of the wedding party.  No elegant chamber music.  This is Kenya: we dance down the aisle.  With catchy music blaring, the bridesmaids danced in from the back and the groomsmen from the sides.  Meeting halfway down the aisle, we then two-stepped the rest of the way to our seats at the front of the church.  This was great fun for everyone as the entire church was standing, clapping, swaying, and singing to the music.  It took a while to get everyone into the church, but really, no one was in a hurry.  Particularly the bride.  To cries of, “This is your day, take your time!”, Gladis came in with a parent on each arm and proceeded to sway, swing, and groove to the music all the way down the aisle.  Both Gladis and Nelson looked great and held firm through the vows and fairly heavy handed sermon from the neighboring Ugandan bishop.  And, after dancing out of the church together, it was off to the photo shoot and reception.

A bit about a wedding reception in rural Kenya: it is, by traditional immemorial, open invitation.  Anything less would be considered rude, inhospitable, and even selfish on the part of the groom’s family.  I’m told that a volunteer committee of about fifty people from around Amagoro had been working for months to make sure everything was in place: food, tents, music, flowers, the cake…  To my casual observation, I think about 1500 people came.  Somehow, they were all fed and seated under the various pavilions erected throughout the Bishop’s compound.  The speeches from politicians and visiting dignitaries, typical of such gatherings, were kept (thankfully) to a minimum, meaning there was more time for eating and dancing.  And Gladis kept the wedding party grooving throughout, calling us up to dance as we made our way into the reception grounds, before cutting the cake, before throwing the bouquet, and even as things were winding up.  In the end, I think everyone was very pleased with the way things played out, and most of us have spent the subsequent few days trying to catch up on lost sleep, retelling stories from the wedding, and cleaning up around the Bishop’s house.  But, Gawd, it was fun.

As we launch into 2012 and the Elewana Project gears up for a new year of scholarships, computer labs, school groups, and lots of visitors (yeah!), I wanted to thank all of you for making 2011 such a great year.  I’ll put out a re-cap and end-of-year report your perusal in a couple weeks, but please know that the Elewana Project is continuing to change the lives of hundreds of young Kenyans and communities across western Kenya.  None of this happens without all of the love and support you give us over here.  THANK YOU!  You are making the world a better place: a calling each of us have and will fulfill in our own way.  Be encouraged.

Mad Love, Zach